The Island.

This afternoon I sat in a pile of laundry watching a TV show.

The show is filled with people my age, men and women, wandering an island while wearing very little clothing. Their entire purpose on that island is to drink alcohol, make questionable decisions and whip up some kind of steamy romance with someone else on the island.

There are tears. There are blurred booties. There are very awkward conversations and uncomfortable moments.

BUT as I sat there in a pile…no…A MOUNTAIN of clothing, listening to a screaming infant, refolding a towel I had folded four times already, I watched these people and I thought…

“I could have whipped the shit out of some romance on this stupid ass show.”

#itotallycouldhave #beforebabies #thesewhinyovergrownbabypeoplearetheworst 

Of course I don’t want to be on this show. I’m happily married. My husband has seen me at my absolute FLIPPING worst and he STILL likes me.

#cantletthisonego #heismyfave #dontneednoisland

Plus, I’ve invested 9 years into this whole “raising kids” thing and there ain’t nothing in this giant, endless universe that could convince me to start any of that nonsense all over again.

#aintNOTHIN #nowayinHELL

ALL THAT ASIDE, I couldn’t help but wonder what a life like theirs must be like. These people are 28 ish years old, on average. By the time I was 28, way back when, I was very pregnant with my fourth baby.

(( Ok, I was 28 last year. Yes…I’m 29. To most of my friends, I’m basically an infant. And to the rest, you’ll be surprised that I’m ONLY 29 because…well…I have four kids and have been married for nearly 10 years. And I like sleeping more than almost anything. ))

And now that I’m 29, I spend most of my afternoons sitting in mountains of laundry or strapped into a minivan, rushing around marking off my lengthy to-do list while reminding myself that restricting screen time is my God-given right and…

“You’re the adult…you’re the adult…stay strong…you are in charge, here!”

(( Do you have a DVD player in your vehicle? No? Good. Don’t do it. ))

Anyway, today was especially difficult to stomach as I sat there, buttons being pushed by a mischievous three year old and a couple of bickering older kids who kept bothering the teething baby. Again and again the noise levels in my house rose higher and higher. Again and again the piles of clothing were knocked over and stepped on or drooled on or peed on or spilled on.

Again and AGAIN my referee skills were required in order to keep my other kids from killing each other or destroying each others things. 

I vented to a few unsuspecting but VERY kind friends.

I cried a few tears of frustration.

I wiped my tears with Batman underpants.

#boymom #realmomsdrytearsinlaundry #justkidding #allmomsarerealmoms #dontletmehurtyourfeels

***

It’s the end of the day now and my tears are gone, my kids are in bed, at least the Baby is asleep. There are still only about 6 towels folded and there is more dirty laundry added to the laundry room than there was CLEAN laundry that came OUT of it…but…

…here I am.

Alive. My kids are alive. 

Everyone was happy until about 2 seconds ago when my 3 year old was stripped of his bouncy ball privileges and he marched back out of my room, heading to bed with his hands on his hips crying out…

“You’re NOT the nicest Mommy and I’m just MAD AT YOU!”

#ivebeentoldworse #notthenicestMommy

***

So I’ve logged another day on my own little island in my own kind of weird paradise.

My day was filled with tiny people, boys and girls, wandering this island while wearing very little clothing. Their entire purpose here is to eat and drink, make questionable decisions and whip up some kind of reckless, ridiculous drama with someone else on the island.

There are tears. There are bare booties. There are very awkward conversations and uncomfortable moments.

***

Today I was reminded that sometimes just making it to the end of the day is all the accomplishment I need to feel alright about my life in my own little world on my own little island.

Have you been where I’m at? Do you ever feel how I’ve felt? Alone? Trapped on an island with a handful of naked whiny babies who do nothing but pee on your towels and wonder where the food has gone???

Well, I’m here…if you ever need someone to talk to.

That’s all. I’m here.

Barely making it to bed time. Just like you.

***

ANNNND I literally just heard the screams from the other room echoing the words…

“I’M TELLING ON YOU!!!!”

#thatsmycue #goodnightworld #timetowhiptheshitouttasomechildren #justkidding #butreally

Cheers –

Allison.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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